Daily quote #364

"I'll do some rumor worthy actions." - Dave

"I ain't ya average nigga." - Scott

Daily quote #363

"Wait, how old are you? Nevermind. I'll pay you $500 if you get your real name legally changed to J Thunder. ... Just do it for a year or two." - Scott

"Yes cats can have abortions. My grandmas cat had one last summer." - Kelly

"I just fucked a lesbian!" - Anonymous

"Some fag on my couch looks like you." - Jeremy

Me: What kind of beer do you want?
Jeremy: I don't care. A light beer. I have to watch my figure, I'm almost 28.

"Whats life without copyright infringement?" - Jeremy

Daily quote #362

Me: Yo, I just gotta stay black, ya know?
Mother Bear: Justin Ryan! What would your grandma say?

"My breakfast was cigarettes and Jack Daniels. ... I look rough as shit!" - Dave

"I'm drunk and just ran into a girl's car." - Dave

"Where are my photos, fag bag?" - Jeremy

"You're the white Biggie of 2008." - Jay

Daily quote #361

"At bar. Alone. Drinking." - Lauren

Daily quote #360

"I'd cry if I broke my computer. Then again, I need mine for school. Not just for play time and fake ID making. Not pointing any fingers though." - Erin

Daily quote #359

"Do you know how to get ahold of any Xanax or Valium?" - Corey

"Next time I cum in a bitch Ima scream 'WESTSIDE!' Like, she givin' me head and shit and when I cum it's going to be like 'Uhhh!!! WESTSIDE!'" - Scott

"I'm so fucking hating myself right now. [Why?] I got dicks on me. Apparently I love Josh. My phone is missing. My drawz are a disaster." - Scott

"He ain't bustin no cunt. Sorry, ain't finna happin'. He cunt kissin'. Im cunt bussin'." - Scott regarding Damon's quote below.

"But I do need to get some bitches over the crib, I got some cunt bustin that needs to be done." - Damon

"Good advice man." - Jay in response to me telling him "Drop out of school now. Save the drama."

"You can't say that shit on my page bitch!" - Erin regarding some Tupac lyrics I posted on her comments.

Daily quote #358

"Yo! Maybe that bitch just dumb! Niguh!" - Scott

"I need to put this knife away before I get addicted. ..Addicted to stabbin' shit!" - Scott

Me: Let's make a dead cat myspace.
Scott: Peta would be all over us so fast!

Daily quote #357

"Matt's twice your age almost; That nigga been knee deep in the game for a minute." - Scott

"My dogs keeps eating dead shit... And shitting everywhere, and they're shitting everywhere because they're eating dead shit! - Melanie

Daily quote #356

"So wait, you're really married?" - Maya

"I'm tired of hearing about High Life and McDonald's. That shit is so 2007. I want more crack smoking and knife fights!" - Matt K

Daily quote #355

Me: How often do you get Valentines Day cards like that?
Mother Bear: On February 19th? Not very often.

Front.Back.

Daily quote #354

"Damn Freddy B, you be fuckin' camels or somethin'?" - Scott regarding some stank ass pussy.

"I'll take dat nigga out. I'll take dat nigga out, just like da niggaz dat took that nigga out did... and dey still ain't got caught." - Scott in regards to Tupac

"Lets get a Ferrari!" - Fairfax

Daily quote #353

"Yeeeah... everyone has to touch that shit!" - Scott after peeing outside and on some whack girl's door knob

"You have the uncanny ability to turn something sweet into something dirty." - Erin

"You guys [Scott and I] made me drink salt water?" - Joey

"Na nigga, you givin' me yo purse, wid yo money in it... I'll give you yo purse back, empty, but I'll give you your purse back." - Scott

"Dude, do you realize how afraid I am of you." - Joey talking to Dave.

Daily quote #352

"That cop gunna add you [on myspace]!" - Scott

"We ain't gettin' beer tonight" - Scott as we get searched by the cops on the way to get beer at 1:49am.

Me: Joey, you scared?
Joey: Fuck yeah I'm scared!
As Scott and I laugh while Joey is trembling w/ terror and shaking w/ fear.

"You can't smuggle pot in these pants!" - Cop regarding my Levi 511s.

"Yo, you got your flask on you?" - Scott whispering to me moments before I get felt up by the cop.

Scott: Not anything? Not tickets?
Dave: Fuck you!

"Pretty crazy night eh?!" - Dave

"I ain't steelin' no cop car. ... Naw, shut the fuck up; I ain't gunna steal a cop car." - Scott

"Dude! Cops are sketchy!" - Dave

"I was gunna steal your your air freshna if you went to jail." - Scott regarding Dave about going to jail.

Daily quote #351

"Dude, do you like my purse?" - Joey

"...yeah, that is a good idea! It's hilarious, but you're an asshole! ... Yeah, you're such an asshole!" - Melanie

"I love the Flint town. It made me who I am; No other city on earth could have done that." - Jeremy

"Dear Justin, I don't want a Valentine. So yeah, you can just be my nigga." - Fairfax

"Shit sucks, so drink up." - Dave

"Pain reminds you that you're alive." - Father Bear

Daily quote #350

"I'm drunx. Happy bleeding <3s day." - Fairfax

"So I sat here for like an hour reading "The Daily Quote". Pretty much all I learned was that Lauren isnt a cat, your dad's advice is dope shit, Dave's quotes about burnin shit scare me a little, and I've come to realize that the reason why I can never find any sweet shoes dirt cheap is because your bros are swiping that shit. Fuckkkkkk." - Cynthia

"Stay up up player." - Jason

"You're tooooo good at typing like a 12 yr. old girl." - Joey

"Scott just said 'potty'. It's so rad." - Joey

"Unquotable!" - Joey

Daily quote #349

"You need to go for a triple-dapple sometime. That's the real deal if you can pull it, but jugglin' that much ass is hard as fuck." - Matt K

"I'll pay you $20 to quit your job." - Scott

"I'm wearing 2/3s of a shirt right now." - Dave

"We don't luh deez hoz." - Scott

"I just saw a juggalo again. You are the only person I could think of who would think it was a little funny." - Stacie

".. no worries, I ate a Bible that night." - Dave

"Chin up, tits out mother fucker." - Lin-zee

"We don't luh deez hoz." - Scott

"My favorite thing to do lately is to wrap a scarf around my hair and pretend I have cancer." - Lin-zee

Daily quote #348

Me: I have some vodka but NOTHING to chase w/ it, unless I want to chase it w/ water or soymilk.
Dave: ..or more vodka! What kind of alchoholic are you?!

"Thank goodness you have an eye and a camera to document memories. When you pull those negatives or photos out later, you'll realize just how much fun shit you FORGOT! Savor life." - Matt K

"I posted a link to The Daily Quote on the Emerica [message]board; Niggaz wuz feelin Scott." - Joey

"I think you need to find another occupation than a hustla" - Anonymous

"That fucking cat better not pee on top of the fridge. I'll kill it." - Lauren

"I dont know where ______ is now but I have his dog.. and no dog food. I fed it a bagel and some turkey bacon." - Lauren

"I drank a lot last night and drove across a lake. Like Jesus, except my feet were tires!." - Luaren

Daily quote #347

"Erin, Jay, and your dad need to keep up w/ Scott, Morgan and I. We all had quotes with the word nigga in them." - Joey regarding #346

"Wait, do you think it's bad that I didn't finish taking all my pills after my abortion?" - Melanie

"I wish I was that good at cash, money, and hoes." - Jay

"I thought about moving to Michigan until I read that Detroit became America's most miserable city." - Erin

"I have two unicorn paintings on plaques on my wall." - Joey

"So dude, I went to WalMart and bought some tight shoes for $5... in the womens section." - Joey

Daily quote #346

"Why you trying to play me like a bitch?" - Jay

"You know Justin, you're a lot like me. You really are a nice guy, but you just try to be an asshole, and you kind of fail at it. I do the same, but you really are a nice guy. But don't worry, I won't tell anyone. I know you have a reputation to uphold." - Father Bear

"You're not a real street nigga. You're caucasian. How many times do I have to tell you?" - Morgan

"I just said fuck you to that new aim shit and went back to being a real nigga." - Joey

"Where do you work? Is it something sketchy? I bet it is." - Erin

"Yo, NIGGA! If you would've hit me w/ that condom you threw at me, Ida slapped tha shhhit outta yo bitch ass!" - Scott

Daily quote #345

"No, I'd love for you to be my intern, but I don't trust you enough to be my intern." - Lauren

"Be my intern. You won't get paid, but you'll get compensated in booze.. and I think that's all you buy anyway..." - Lauren

"Come live with me and be my intern." - Lauren

"I love it when girls are fucking stupid like that... and... CAT DON'T PEE ON MY SHIT!" - Lauren

"..It's like a crying baby. I'm going to kick it in it's face." - Lauren

"I'm not a cat." - Lauren

"You're good. There's nothing wrong w/ drinking a lot. ... I drink a lot so that I have a legit excuse to fuck a bunch of dudes." - Lauren

Daily quote #344

"I've always been taught that you'll never regret helping someone in need. It's the times when you DON'T that will always make you wonder." - Matt K

Daily quote #343

"How do you make your money? Anything illegal?" - Mother Bear

"Dude, like, I got a boombox, so I can sell my ipod now." - Dave

"..I ain't a little kid. I ain't shovelin' shit. I'm so glad I'm not a little kid." - Dave

"[Me:Are you driving?] Hell yeah! I'm scared! Burn it down!" - Dave

"I've real hooked on burnin' shit right now, and like, blowing shit up!" - Dave

Me: What are you doing on Friday?
Dave: Burnin' shit?

"Lets go to the Warehouse tomorrow then burn it down!" - Dave

"I thought I was gonna hit a cheese jackpot." - Billy

Dave is on the left.
I'm the cat right.

Daily quote #342

"Your dad's sweet. Hands down, cool." - Scott

"You fucked!" - Scott as he is laying on the floor almost in tears laughing.

"Yo bay-be, I like the way you cutchya gard[en]." - Scott

"I got outbid on ebay for the first time I a while. Fuckum." - Joey

"What if I Heath Ledger? What if I die in my sleep?!" - Lin-zee

"So I'm gonna ignore you from here on out." - Lin-zee

Daily quote #341

"I'll fuck her chin." - Scott

"You have the dopest handwriting ever. That's high standards in my book buddy!" - Damon

"Baller rule # 455.8: Never get with a ho that doesn't suck dick! Ya' feel me? You gotta git that knob wet or that bitch is GONE!" - Matt K

"Girls can smell that other skeezers twat like a fucking bloodhound." - Matt K

"I just fell over like a damn tree." - Joey

"How bigs ur dik?" - Travis

"Nate & Duane went to Chicago to try out for American Gladiators." - Sister Bear

Daily quote #340

"What's it like to be an icky doo doo head, like, all the time?" - Lin-zee

Me: That a solid booga!
Scott: Ya, Ima solid nigga!

Melanie: I think it's going to be too big. ... Don't say it.
Me: That's what she said.

"You know what's funny? You have no booze, youre grumpy, and you're totally not getting laid tonight." - Lin-zee

"You're so jaded, man." - Lin-zee

Daily quote #339

Father Bear: I don't get stressed.
Me: Why?
Father Bear: Because I don't sweat the small stuff.
Me: Why?
Father Bear: Because it's all small stuff.
Me: Exactly!
Father Bear: That's probably the best advice I've ever given you.

Daily quote #338

"I hate when websites go under maintenance. I need my porn now. Not in 4 hours. Bitches." - Erin

"Happiness is contagious." - Erin

"Wutchay crackin' yo nuckles foo nigga? Wutchya crackin' 'em fo bitch." - Scott

"I wish I was a thick black women." - Travis

"Man. Sex. Dude, whys it rule so hard? KEEP CRUSHIN'!" - Travis

"You're so stupid." - Maya

"I've heard "umm I might be pregnant" like 3 times probably." - Travis

"You're ego's already the size of Jay Leno's shin." - Fairfax

"Hey nigga. I know youre doing some real serious shit like, trying to get some pussy or lattes or soemthing on that real good tip, but I have a question for you." - Joey

"I just want to be MILF. If nothing else. I want to be the mom the boys on my son's soccer team fantasize about." - Erin

"Mr. I Cantspellreallygaythings." - Joey