"Yeeeah... everyone has to touch that shit!" - Scott after peeing outside and on some whack girl's door knob
"You have the uncanny ability to turn something sweet into something dirty." - Erin
"You guys [Scott and I] made me drink salt water?" - Joey
"Na nigga, you givin' me yo purse, wid yo money in it... I'll give you yo purse back, empty, but I'll give you your purse back." - Scott
"Dude, do you realize how afraid I am of you." - Joey talking to Dave.
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