"Oh my god, can you quote yourself you dumbass?" - Melanie
"I didn't have a wrench so I got you a pipe clamp." - Joey
"Oh my god! Are those really the napkins Scott gave you? Right beside the bed?! ... You better not use them; I swear to god." - Anonymous
"It's like a dryer in here; It's hot and smells good." - Anonymous
"It was like Quick Draw McGraw and shit." - Scott after trying to run over a bunny in my yard while driving the Tracker.
"Wussup nigaaaaz?!" - Scott as he busts in my house unannounced while we're in bed
"Why do you want to go back to California? What's so great about it?" - Sandra
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