"I just found a dead dog in my Koi Pond." - Jeremy
"I don't want a gay boyfriend." - Anonymous
"Mom, I don't think your boobs will fit into that... ..Well, maybe they will." Little girl to her mother in THE store.
"Go to the bathroom and stop touching my racks." - Michele
"Of course you're having a bad day [Michele], Justin is here. Everyone has a bad day when he's here." - Kelly
"You're always quoting. I'm not going to talk ever again around you, is that what you want? [Me: Yeah, actually.] You're so mean." - Kelly
"You look kind cute today." - Kelly
"That one has to be anonymous. If you're going to quote it, quote it as anonymous only." - Heidi
"I don't smoke. I smoked two joints by myself yesterday." - Anonymous
Me: Are you high?
Heidi: Very.
"Hah, no beer today?" - Gas Station Worker #2 as I'm getting rung up for my ice tea.
"Stockin' up on beer early today?" - Gas Station Worker #1 as I'm intend on buying an ice tea, not beer.
"Bryan's suppose to die soon, hopefully." - Scott regarding the guy that knocked Brenda up.
"April told me her vagina was going to bleed makes me wish I was aborted." - Nate
Kelly: Don't call me a bitch.
Me: I didn't, I called you a beoch. B-E-O-C-H not B-I-T-C-H. Beoch.
Kelly: Whatever.
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